Bush has been Bangalored !

Washington - Congress today announced that the office of President
of the United States of America will be outsourced to India as of July 1,
2007. The move is being made in order to save the President's $500,000
yearly salary, and also a record $521 Billion in deficit expenditures and
related overhead the office has incurred during the last 5 years. "We
believe this is a wise financial move. The cost savings are huge," stated
Congressman Thomas Reynolds (R-WA). "We cannot remain competitive on the
world stage with the current level of cash outlay," Reynolds noted.

Mr. Bush was informed by e-mail this morning of his termination.
Preparations for the job move have been underway for some time.

Gurvinder Singh of Indus Teleservices (Mumbai ,India) will assume the office
of President as of July 10, 2007. Mr. Singh was born in the United States
while his Indian parents were vacationing at Niagara Falls, thus making him
eligible for the position. He will receive a salary of $320 a month
but with no health coverage or other benefits.

It is believed that Mr. Singh will be able to handle his job
responsibilities without a support staff. Due to the time difference between
the US and India, he will be working primarily at night, when few offices of
the US Government will be open. "Working nights will allow me to keep my day
job at the Dell Computer call center," stated Mr. Singh in an exclusive
interview. "I am excited about this position. I always hoped I would be
President."

A Congressional spokesperson noted that while Mr. Singh may not be fully
aware of all the issues involved in the office of President, this should not
be a problem, as President Bush was not familiar with the issues either.

Mr. Singh will rely upon a script tree that will enable him to respond
effectively to most topics of concern. Using these canned responses, he can
address common concerns without having to understand the underlying issue at
all. "We know these scripting tools work," stated the spokesperson.
"President Bush has used them successfully for years."

Bush will receive health coverage, expenses, and salary until his final day
of employment. Following a two-week waiting period, he will be eligible for
$140 a week unemployment for 13 weeks.

He will not also be eligible for Medicaid, as his unemployment benefits will
exceed the allowed limit. Mr. Bush has been provided the outplacement
services of Manpower, Inc., to help him write a resume and prepare for his
upcoming job transition.

According to Manpower, Mr. Bush may have difficulties in securing a new
position due to limited practical or successful work experience. A greeter
position at Wal-Mart was suggested due to Bush's extensive experience
shaking hands, as well as his special smile.