The Sparrow and the Cuckoo:Guilt and Redemption

Weboids :
"When immersed in a liquid , a dead sparrow will make a sound like a crying baby. "

I felt sick as soon as I read it.This all seemed like a cruel joke of some large magnitude.God's own joke on me !

There lay a dead sparrow on the window sill.I desperately wanted it to be undead--for it to miraculously fly away , unhurt .I also knew the chances of this sparrow coming back to life were pretty slim.

I killed it.

Yes , I am a sparrow killer...and I feel terribly bad about it...

In my defense , It was an accident.
Honest.

Somehow two sparrows had flown into my apartment.I wanted to open the windows and release them.Fate had something else on mind.

The sliding window panel was stuck.I had to apply a great amount of force to open it.When I opened it , it flew.
At the very instant the window pane slid to the other side , the female sparrow flew towards the wrong end.

I heard a muffled crunch.I was afraid to see what I thought had happened.

The male sparrow flew out , towards freedom whereas the female lay dead , its body crushed between the window pane and the sill.The window had opened on the other side.It was just a matter of bad choice for the  female sparrow.

Not willing to believe what just had happened , I walked away, hoping against all hopes that the sparrow would just fly away from the window which I had kept open.

Then I read my morning newspaper.

Weboids :
"When immersed in a liquid , a dead sparrow will make a sound like a crying baby. "

Are you tempting me, God ? Is this your version of a prank ?A sick joke ?

Ha Ha , Gotcha !
Now lets see if our self-professed animal lover satisfies his scientific hunger by verifying the data claimed in the weboids?
Will the dead sparrow cry like a baby ?

(Wont you try ?)

(You'll know once and for all )

(C'mon , you can do it ...there's a bucket filled with water ready in the bathroom.All you have to do is pick the sparrow up and dunk it .)

(C'mon , be a sport !)

I was in denial.I was still not ready to believe that I had killed the sparrow.I read the entire newspaper twice before coming back to the room .

It was still there.Quite dead.No doubts about it .

Such a tiny little being .So full of energy.The two sparrows were probably mates , in search of a good nesting site.She could have even been pregnant.
This was worse.I was a pregnant-sparrow killer.

I was reluctant to go near the body.I was reluctant to touch it .But I had to dispose it before it got too late .

I searched for some kind of gloves.No luck.All I could manage was an old dish cloth.I was actually shaking when my hand went near the body




(BOO!)



No , it didn't jump up and grab my throat for revenge.It was dead.To quote a cliche "It was dead as a Dodo"

The body was so light!
Its whole body was feather light and compact enough to fit in my palm.Its eyes were thankfully closed.I wouldn't be able to bear the accusing eyes staring at me in my nightmares.I'd be doomed,  never able to sleep again.

There was nothing left to do.I wasn't going to dunk the sparrow in water.All animals deserve our respect.Even in its untimely death , the sparrow deserved respect.

"From dust to dust , from ashes to ashes , from earth to earth " This was the way of the nature.The dead would nurture the living.I took the sparrow down and dug a grave , a small hole in the soft wet soil and buried it .That was the end of the sparrow, but it would be an endless night of guilt and shame for me .
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Love requires infinite patience.
There are times when one has to wait for an eternity for his love to be accepted.Especially when the recipient knows not that you are giving love or when you don't know how to love in a way that can be understood by the other.


Our family gets a lot of injured and abandoned animals at home.We are known around the neighbourhood for our efforts in animal protection , treatment and rehabilitation.

In the past , we have dealt with innumerable kittens , pups and sometimes even cows ,monkeys and eagles.

However this was the first time we got a cuckoo.A friend of ours found a baby cuckoo on the ground , with no apparent injuries.He waited for a while , but saw that if he left it in its state , the crows would probably attack it.He promptly brought it over to our house.

Cuckoos are from the order Cucliformes .Many of theses species are notorious for their habit of brood parasitism i.e laying their eggs in the nests of other birds and foisting on them the responsibility of hatching and rearing the young.

Our baby cuckoo or the common Koel (Eudynamys scolopacea) was a male with glistening metallic black all over , with a striking yellowish green bill and crimson or blood red eyes.The female cuckoo is brown , spotted and barred with white.

I watched in awe as mom patiently tried to feed it.She had a lot of patience.(I think she got that from  taking care of me all these years :)  )The cuckoo's diet mainly consists of banyan and peepal figs , various berries and hairy caterpillars.(source : Common Birds , Salim Ali &Laaeq Futehally ).We couldn't find any of these.Also this was a baby .It was probably used to eating what its parents had regurgitated out.How the heck were we supposed to regurgitatehairy caterpillars?Instead we tried to feed it other fruits viz. ripe banana pieces , guavas , and papayas.

Mom handed over the responsibility of feeding the cuckoo over to me.It had to be fed every 2-3 hours or so.This was my first time handling a bird.I prayed for patience and strength.Maybe this was my chance to redeem myself for the sparrow I'd killed.

A right to lessen the burden of a wrong.

Yeah , we were coming to a full circle now , God and Me .

The cuckoo had never seen a human before .Naturally it was afraid.I too had to patiently follow the cuckoo , while it kept hopping away from me .Soon I had made enough progress to touch the cuckoo.I was allowed to stroke it while feeding it mashed bananas.It also sipped water from a syringe .
Soon , I had to acclimatize the cuckoo to my presence and touch.I held it lightly...as lightly as possible.It showed its dislike by opening its mouth gaping wide soundlessly and showing its blood red mouth...

Patience is the key.
Gentleness is the key.

Focus .

Do not lose concentration.
Do not squeeze.It is only a little  bird.

Then came the papayas.
I'm glad to say , our baby cuckoo likes  little bits of mashed papayas and it ate plenty of it and made my family smile .I think it will survive.
It's still kept in our unused bathroom.There is no other place , because we have four cats, who like to catch a mouse or two every now and then..But I think it will survive !

This is not over.
Its not so easy to end an incomplete story.
Well , this is not a story.
This is real.And I don't know where this ends .

Only time will tell where this will lead.
Maybe there is still hope for me.
Maybe I can get rid of my guilt .