How far would you go for love?(and other random observations)

Only thoughts can be random...the very act of penning down your thoughts destroys the randomness that was originally present...thus making this title a lie.

Holy Shit!

How would you react if I told you that somewhere in this world, shit is holy,

You'd go (quite predictably) 'Holy Shit!'

But in India, cows are holy, and most things from a cow are equally holy.Thus we have the holy cow, the holy cow's holy milk (and all other milk derivatives like holy butter,holy ghee,holy paneer), holy cow's holy piss, holy cow's holy shit (which we like to call cowdung).

But elsewhere, holy cows make tasty hamburgers!

I wish you all a Happy Holy.(coming soon to a store near you on march 11th)

How far would you go for love?

A: 48 +- 5 km.

God requires topless men!

             There are a few temples in india, where if you are a man, you have to go topless to gain entrance(I find it sexist that women are exempted).As a shy boy once upon a time, I had refused to risrobe in front of total strangers.I wanted a valid reason for stripping myself.Mom told me that it was so that god could know that you were literally pure.I bet she didn't know the real reason.

Without a shirt, in India, anyone can know your religion and caste and your general heirarchy in matters of divinity.Brahmins and Kshatriyas wear a holy thread called janiwu and it denotes their upper ranks to the rest of the world.

On that fateful day, I steadfastly refused to take off my shirt.I was no longer shy...rather simply too stubborn.

Disinhibition

I spoke to my ex-neighbour today...we were chatting via IM.

In alll the years we were next to each other, I don't remember talking to her for more than five minutes.Those talks were filled with awkward pauses and silences.Today though, we spoke for two whole hours, and shared things we never would dream of sharing when facing each other.We now know more about each other more than what we knew from the past eleven years that we lived next to each other.

It was possible because we weren't actually talking to each other.We were staring at the monitor and responding to a string of sentences and coded textual information instead of flesh and blood.

Complic8ed

Trying to simplify certain actions tend to over-complicate it...take for instance the act of shaving and break it down into minute steps.(I'll keep it simple)

1)Apply a detergent based foam on face and aerate it with a shaving brush or fingers.

2)Let an approximate time interval pass by so that hair follicles are sufficiently softened and the skin well lubricated.

3)Take a very sharp blade and ritualistically drag it across the skin in an attempt to cut hair follicles and abrade the skin.

4)Rinse and Repeat if necessary (or if required results are not obtained)

5)Your instruments sometimes resemble heat seeking missiles with multiple projectiles.

Lofty claims such as 'The best a man can get' are made.Other lofty claims include cavorting suprmodels who are attracted to a follicularly challenged man.

Sick men are big babies.

Moti bit me.

I took full advantage of it by telling it to anyone who cared to listen and gathered as much sympathy as I could.I also shamelessly let mom pamper me for the last 3 days.

Social Value

I've noticed that it is very easy to approach other girls if you are already with a girl.If you go alone, there is a chance that you'll be labeled a creep.A girl on your side gives you full access to shameless flirting without any negative repercussions.

The presence of a woman by your side also softens up other men...makes them more suggestible and compliant.

Ok...Now I need a girl by my side (preferably smart and beautiful) to rule the world.First , we get all the women to follow us, and then the men will automatically follow.

Practice your BWAHAHAHA well.It'll come in handy.

Different Tastes

I didn't get to watch dilli 6.Now I don't know if it is a bad movie, because I don't believe in what others say.I neither listen to critics nor to the masses.

Tomorrow, I have to go to a movie with a Abhishek Bacchan hating Anglophobe who also hates horror movies and Anurag Kashyap.

The only choice as of now...Dhoondte Reh Jaaoge!

Let me ask you again...

How far would you go for love?

A: Reviews will be posted soon!