Flirtmonster

I was shopping recently in bontang and I was trying to return an inverter back(wrong voltage), but I was not making any headway because while I was talking in english(sadly the only foriegn language I'm profecient in) the salesgirl was talking in bahasa Indonesia, of which I know odd phrases like salamat pagi, terima kasih, nasi goreng etc, but nothing conversational ...
So, finally exasperated , I told her in my best pig english "Me no speak Indonesian !"
She said smilingly "Me speak english very little "

Drat !

Then I asked for the manager, who luckily spoke some english.

Then as I spoke to the manager , he translated back to her.

Great !

Then I realised that I hadn't even seen her face properly.
So I did.
She was short, fair, dense curly hair and had a defiant but small moustache[unlike the one Ms.J sports !:)) ] which looked very cute on her.
She reminded me of a cousin back home, so I told her.
I told her how Indian she looked, how beautiful she was ,how she could easily be in the movie business,how she had a great aura(it was a rare shade of gold,conical and swirling lazily over her head), how cute her nose was,etc etc...
                 I realised that even when I didn't know her name nor spoke the same language, I was talking to her and making her smile , all the time with the manager was translating.
 In short I was flirting !
Shamelessly !
GAAAH ! I've become a Flirtmonster ! Help me ! Somebody Stop me !

I blame it all on testosterone.

 I'm on a new diet called testosterone diet.It's the only way I can safely increase my body weight , increase my muscle mass as opposed to increasing my  body fat.
It includes plenty nuts (no, not those kind!) , dry fruits and legumes (sadly making me flatulent !) and free weight exercises like dead lifts , squats and pushups and stuff and abstinence.This is supposed to increase my natural testosterone levels .

The effects are that my appetite has expanded beyond measure. Before I was constantly dozing. Now I have enough energy for daily workouts and strict work schedules. With the additional  testosterone , I  feel better to recover from life's curveballs, more persistant, more alive. With the testosterone, I feel more energy.

Testosterone, oddly enough, is a chemical closely related to cholesterol. It was first isolated by a Dutch scientist in 1935 from mice testicles and successfully synthesized by the German biologist Adolf Butenandt. Although testosterone is often thought of as the definition of maleness, both men and women produce it. Men produce it in their testicles; women produce it in their ovaries and adrenal glands. The male body converts some testosterone to estradiol, a female hormone, and the female body has receptors for testosterone, just as the male body does. That's why women who want to change their sex(why would you want to be a man ?) are injected with testosterone and develop male characteristics, like deeper voices, facial hair and even baldness. The central biological difference between adult men and women, then, is not that men have testosterone and women don't. It's that men produce much, much more of it than women do. An average woman has 40 to 60 nanograms of testosterone in a deciliter of blood plasma. An average man has 300 to 1,000 nanograms per deciliter.

Testosterone's effects start early -- really early. At conception, every embryo is female and unless hormonally altered will remain so. You need testosterone to turn a fetus with a Y chromosome into a real boy, to masculinize his brain and body. Men experience a flood of testosterone twice in their lives: in the womb about six weeks after conception and at puberty. The first fetal burst primes the brain and the body, endowing male fetuses with the instinctual knowledge of how to respond to later testosterone surges. The second, more familiar adolescent rush -- squeaky voices, facial hair and all -- completes the process.

The effect of testosterone is systemic. It engenders both the brain and the body. Apart from the obvious genital distinction, other differences between men's and women's bodies reflect this: body hair, the ratio of muscle to fat, upper-body strength and so on. But testosterone leads to behavioral differences as well. Since it is unethical to experiment with human embryos by altering hormonal balances, much of the evidence for this idea is based on research conducted on animals. A Stanford research group, for example, as reported in Deborah Blum's book "Sex on the Brain," injected newborn female rats with testosterone. Not only did the female rats develop penises from their clitorises, but they also appeared fully aware of how to use them.

But do not confuse testosterone with Popeye's spinach.Testosterone levels will rise when the situation warrants it. Survival is the priority." So in cases of danger, of war, the testosterone levels increase. When in a strip club or viewing a porno website, testosterone levels also rise. Men with higher testosterone achieve psychological dominance, have high self esteem, and move through the world with natural confidence.Testosterone is clearly correlated in both men and women with psychological dominance, confident physicality and high self-esteem. In most combative, competitive environments, especially physical ones, the person with the most testosterone wins. Put any two men in a room together and the one with more testosterone will tend to dominate the interaction.

The relatively new science of evolutionary psychology offers perhaps the best explanation for why that's not the case in humans. For neo-Darwinians, the aggressive and sexual aspects of testosterone are related to the division of labor among hunter-gatherers in our ancient but formative evolutionary past. This division -- men in general hunted, women in general gathered -- favored differing levels of testosterone. Women need some testosterone -- for self-defense, occasional risk-taking, strength -- but not as much as men. Men use it to increase their potential to defeat rivals, respond to physical threats in strange environments, maximize their physical attractiveness, prompt them to spread their genes as widely as possible and defend their home if necessary.

But the problem with testoserone is that it makes me horny...So horny that I begin to shamelessly flirt with any woman.So if I'm not flirting with you , and you dont have a dick , then I'm repelled by you , you possibly are the ugliest thing I've evr seen on this side of the galaxy (I've travelled a lot ) , or have a personality defect that makes me puke my guts out...

                             But testosterone makes everyone horny, not just me .If there's one substance that ultimately makes it possible to get turned on in the first place, testosterone is probably it. "When testosterone is gone, says UCLA's Berman, for whatever reason — aging, medication — men experience erection and libido problems." Restore the testosterone, and you usually fix those problems.The study, published in 2000 in the New England Journal of Medicine, reported that many of the women who, like Washington, were on real testosterone had more sexual fantasies and more sex and masturbated more than they had before. But so, albeit to a lesser extent, did women who wore patches with no testosterone at all. For women suffering from lost libido, the placebo effect was almost as strong as that of the hormone. In short, the mere belief that the treatment would rekindle sexual desire was often enough to turn up the heat.

Here's the thing though.Natural testosterone is the best.Artificial testosterone boosts are unhealthy and dangerous and have long term damage to your system.So Dont go on injecting shit or pop shitty pills in your system for the sake of a quick fix or vanity.It is simply not worth it.
Oh yeah , and remember , testosterone makes you horny.So be careful and responsible.

p.s.
                 Well I'm trying rein in myself these days, by having some constructive and achievable goals..I've started lifting weights.
My body weight is 68 kg, so now I can be officially called a 150 lb weakling.
I started benching and doing heavy squats.I began with (ok dont laugh) 20 kg weights and now I have gone up to 50 kgs(110 lb) .My  next goal is to lift my own body weight , which is to bench press 150 lb.
Wish me luck.

 

Attachment: GF APPLICATION.pdf